🫀1/20 6:55 am

 Last night I went to bed very early my neck and back were so sore.  It was so loud. Things were slamming, pumps were going off. I could hear it all above the ear plugs and white noise head phones and a pillow over my head.

At 3:00 am Ethan woke up and was beside himself. The nurse tried so hard to calm him down. I heard her talking to him and popped out of bed. She said “He wants Mom.” I went over to the bed and saw him so upset. He saw me and put his arm up wide in the air and signaled me to come in for a big hug.  As I was hugging him, I could hear the rhythm of the breathing machine change. I looked at him and he had his face crinkled up just so sad. He started pointing, rather aggressively, towards the bed. “Do you want me to sit in your bed with you?” He shook his head yes.

His nurse moved him off to the side.  She then helped me ninja my way through all the cords and Iv lines. I got into bed with Ethan. He leaned his head towards me and almost immediately fell asleep. I did not. There were blood draws, suctions, eye drops, pumps going off, the room next to us had the high alert alarm going off every 5 minutes. 

He seemed to have more secretions from his tube over night. His antibiotics were stopped 2 days ago, so we will see. His X-ray looked a little more fluidy this morning. They collected another culture. It’s weird, his white count in normal and his fever went away, so who knows. Ethan is just doing his “medical Ethan” thing.

My mom reminded me yesterday that I never shared that Ethan’s biopsy came back with NO REJECTION!!!!!  Woo hoo!

They decreased Ethan’s pain medication a little this morning, we will see how he does with that. Ethan is down to 7 pumps. Holy shit!

All of this is my bright spot and the day just began (at 3 am).