5/20

Today Ethan and I headed out for dialysis. Dialysis training is fun. My BFF dialysis nurse keeps me laughing. I am sort of getting the hang of it. Next up is making the connections to Ethan’s catheter in a sterile way. I am ready. I can do it. I feel good about it.

Ethan and I went to lunch before his first heart check up after transplant at Strong. We had a wonderful conversation about what we have both been through. I think I am his therapist now. I never had one lesson. Ha! He’s doomed.  He was nervous about his heart check up. He was verbalizing it and I was happy about that. It was a very productive chat.

On the way to the hospital, I saw signs for the lilac festival. We took a quick detour. I have never been to the lilac festival and neither has Ethan. We both don’t like crowds. Today was the perfect day. We stopped near the lilacs and walked a small bit. The sweet smells of lilac perfumed air swirled around us. Wow! Dark purple, light purple, white lilacs, they were so pretty.

We got to the hospital. Here he was walking into cardiology for the first time since he was told he had to get a transplant. His doctor is a sweet man and was delighted to see him.

As Ethan’s nervousness gained speed, it was time for his echo. Ugh! The echo. The thought of the ultrasonographer applying pressure to his sternum had Ethan sweating bullets. We pleaded with her to be gentle and to not use the blasted foam sticky button things  that they connect the wires to. He still has one on his skin from May 5 th. His PTSD for sticky tabs is insane but understandable. They were tearing off layers of his skin at the hospital. He was bleeding from it.

It was really the first time Ethan got to appreciate his new heart. His ultrasonographer said that he was making her look good with his beautiful heart. She was very careful and didn’t hurt him at all. He said that was the best echo he has ever had.

The doctor said that his heart looks really good. He still has mild pulmonary hypertension but it is being controlled pretty well. Ethan was pumped to get a good report. He was prepared to be admitted. I am hoping that he gets more good visits under his belt. We both will always brace ourselves for his cardiology visits. But this was a good day. That is one time in a row at that office.

We came home and he was tired. He ate and rested. He is struggling with healing and resting but we are getting through it. He wants to go go go. 

There were lots of bright spots today.