Today I met with my support ladies. They help keep me on track with insurance issues, medical issues etc. they asked thoughtful questions. One of the questions was “do you get flash backs or anxious feelings entering the children’s hospital in NYC?” The answer was no.
In fact throughout all of this I haven’t had a true panic attack at all. The monitoring machines at work make me feel tense when they alarm and I can’t silence them.
They also taught me about some of the psychological effects of being in ICU from a parent and patient perspective. They were letting me know the this upcoming surgery can trigger some things in the brain for both Ethan and I as we prepare for travel back to the city. All of it is so interesting. I felt empowered with knowledge afterward.
Ethan put out his next YouTube video. I think he has been using my blog as a way to process and cope with what he went through. If you want to watch it, here is the link.
I was also able to paint The cheap dresser I bought for Ethan. I also stained and polyerothaned some boards I am using for shelves in my bathroom. It felt good to have the time for things I enjoy.
I got my flu shot today. I felt nothing except by 8:00 I was feeling tired. I listened to my body and went to bed.
Ps. Thank you for all the comments, I read them everyday but can’t answer from this platform. I know…it’s stupid.
And even when I don't comment (which is most days) I read the blog every day. Hugs.
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