8/12/22

Today was my short day at work. I get to leave at 2:00! Yay for Fridays. I picked Avery up from her work. As I was driving there, my phone rang. It was collections….again…..for the third time this week.

I answered it to show good faith that we are working on this. The man said they typical, “this is how much you owe….how do you want to pay”…..

I explained, for the hundredth time or maybe more, that our insurance Liaison was working on this and if he noticed, there have been several insurance payments since January of 2021.

He felt the need to tell me that I had to “harass” our insurance liaison so that we can get these bills resolved quicker…..or I will continue to get phone calls. I paused. 

Really Sir? Really? We have been clearly dealing with this for, well we are encroaching on TWO years. YES I AM AWARE. Also, I have to repeat the same thing OVER and OVER three times a week, that is after YOU call me. I have to verify my address, date of birth, and phone number (even though you called me). Then repeat the same thing I told the other person 2 days prior. What a time suck.

Unpaused….I said “I understand” and left it at that. 

Avery then got into the car. She is a good listener. She listened to me vent about my frustrations with the process….complete with me mimicking the man in a not so flattering way.

When we got home, we watched an episode of our show while I shoveled lunch into my face. Seriously…I bulldozed my lunch. It’s not lady-like but no one was looking so it doesn’t count.

I decided I should utilize my time productively. I also put in an Instacart order while finishing up our show. I then found some motivation within me. I have been feeling a little down this week because it makes me sad, when Ethan is sad.

Also, Paul is feeling stressed about his relationship with Ethan. I carry some of that on my shoulders too. I don’t like when Paul is upset either. 

I decided it was time to clean my basement. I started to declutter. Wow! I bit off more than I could chew. I threw out a bunch of stuff. I sorted a bunch of stuff for the donation pile. I vacuumed. I went up the stairs and down the stairs MANY, MANY times. I felt like I had been to the gym.

 5 hours later…..I am about 20% done. That sounds discouraging, but I have this motivation to continue working. I am excited to get up in the morning and work on it. So weird. It actually has cheered me up in some strange way as I was mostly alone with my thoughts.

I have been a bit negative this week. I don’t like the way that feels. I had to push the reset button. I thought of our donor family. It helps me refocus when I can remember how grateful I am for the life I have. It may not be roses and sunshine all the time…..but I am thankful.

With that, somehow I get a bit better. As I scrubbed and organized, I could feel the soreness setting in. My legs were tired, my back hurt, my eyelids grew heavy.

As I made my way up the stairs, I heard Ethan talking. He was talking to Paul. They were having a civil conversation which I know Paul enjoyed. They have to figure out how to communicate effectively. They were just chatting about car stuff. 

This was my gift today.