One of my co-workers was SO needy today. He kept trying to be as close to me as possible. I ended up having to pull his “work space” as close to mine as possible. He is so high maintenance. I am putting in a complaint to management. Just kidding. Look at how cute he is.
Don’t let those puppy dog eyes fool you. He looks so sad, but he had already had his morning body massage and is laying on a heated blanket to help his old bones.
We had another day of Avery, Ethan and I on the couch. Not much was said, but we shared a few laughs over the show we are watching.
I have been having these reoccurring dreams of Avery “dying” over the past several years. I dream very vividly and sometimes can’t distinguish between a dream and reality.
In one dream, I notice that Avery’s neck looks broken and she is not breathing. In the dream I have to choose if I want to initiate CPR or just let her die, knowing if she lived she could be physically challenged or mentally challenged. This particular dream happens about once a month for the past 15 years or so.
The other recurring dream is that a 4 year old Avery fell over a cliff and there is water below. I have to choose if I am going to jump in and try to save her. I always wake up before I have to make that choice.
I had a new one that involved myself giving Avery instruction. She sits on the left and I am on the right. We were on a device to help transport us from a building on an ocean to the mainland. It is like this disc that is very small. The direction I gave her was to jump off towards the right side. I had a pause between the words off and towards….well she jumped off to her death to the left.
I googled it (because the internet knows everything). I read that you can have dreams about your children dying when there is some sort of life event or change happening. It is a way to cope with your uncertainty with the change. Avery is going to be going away to college soon. That is the culprit. I would prefer never to have these awful dreams at all. Our bodies are funny the way they compensate us.
I am really hoping for some better dreams tonight.
Oh my friend.... we need to make these scary dreams of Avery go bye-bye! That's the last thing you need, but it does make sense that you are unconsciously dealing with her leaving the nest. I wonder if Ethan will be jealous of Avery's situation. Just a wonder.... How did we both get so darn gone smart? Hee hee....
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