Ethan’s Journey

 We hosted our last family Christmas party. It went smooth and was easy. I ordered subs and we had potato chips, crock pot Mac and cheese with pie and ice cream for dessert. It was quite a feast! I had my new Ninja running with Ginger ale and cranberry juice in it. I put some Moscato Di Asti in mine…it was delicious! We played a power point word jumble and trivia game that I made. It was fun and educational. We learned about different Christmas traditions in other countries and how they originated. After our guests left, we picked up and had a leisurely evening. I was annoying Paul with questions. I had to ask a lot of questions due to the vagueness of his answers. Typical Paul! I started cleaning up Christmas decorations. Take the ornaments off the tree. I like the ambient light from the tree in the morning, so it may stay up for a few more days….ornament-less.  Normally we wait until we are into the new year. I have been trying to think of an achievable New Year’s resolution...

 We had another visitor in the bed last night. I am trying to figure out Moe’s issue for jumping the gate to come upstairs. It is a new thing for him. The fire went out over night. He came up around 4 am. I still think it is because he is chilly. I realized the bed in the livingroom was removed for cleaning. So I am seeing if he does it again tonight. I really stoked the fire for him too.  Today I ran to Walmart to get discounted Christmas items for next year. I am that person. It was a mob scene. I grabbed what I needed and got the heck out. I did see that agent has their PILS citrus beer out. I grabbed some 12 packs. We enjoy that beer AND it is affordable. I met up with a friend to go thrifting. We had fun and didn’t buy much. I got a heavy duty item to hold plastic silverware in the camper. It will NOT blow away. We went to lunch and then stopped at an antique/catch all store with many vendors. We wandered around giggling at things and chatting away. It was so fun. We went...

We had a guest join us in the bedroom last night. Don’t get the wrong idea. It wasn’t an upside down pineapple kind of guest.  Our house was chilly but we were warm in our comfy bed. Moe was not comfy. He jumped over the gate at the bottom of our stairs and invited himself in our bed. I woke up this morning with Paul and Moe snuggle sleeping. That dog! Our family has been separated at Christmas in the past. We didn’t see Avery yesterday or today. It is funny how Christmas changes a little bit each couple of years. We will celebrate Christmas with Avery and Kendall on Saturday. We planned it that way. Avery can get overwhelmed if she has too much social activity and not enough recharge time (I wonder where she got that from?) I am very familiar with the line Avery teeters before she loses it. I knew it will just be better this way. Not just for her, for all involved. We planned to do a Saturday family get together for lunch.  Everyone can drive home when it is light out annd st...

 Christmas Eve!  I worked today. Not that hard. I didn’t really “talk” to too many people. I did feel as thought I helped a few people which always warms my heart. We went over to my in-laws house for dinner. We had the traditional Dario’s Lasagne! Yum! Dario and Avery made the noodles on Monday from scratch. This lasagne was massive. It weighed like 20 pounds. If someone leaves the table on Christmas Eve at their house, it’s by their own choice.  Jiminy came with us. He met another dog, Thomas Jefferson. Thomas Jefferson is a dog that Paul’s sister is caring for while the owners are out of the country. Christmas Eve has always been looked back as a fond day for our family.  Jiminy is excited that Santa is coming!

 Ethan went to work today. He was amped up because he was worried it would be more “party” and less “work”.   “I go to work to work.” He said “Life is too short to have to do things you don’t want to do.” He said. He was unsettled and worried as to how the day was going to go. Anxiety at it’s finest. He got to work and it was a relaxed environment. The machines weren’t running today which kind of forced him to socialize.  He said that he views it as more of a “wasting time” situation. We all have a limited amount of time and he doesn’t like to waste his. I do think he has become more of a loner since his medical ordeal. I think his stroke caused trauma to the relationship center of his brain. He prefers being alone. He can be sometimes social…but mostly he is quiet. Around 9 am a few of his co-workers started to have adult beverages. Ethan is not opposed to people drinking and having a good time. To Ethan, alcohol is a drug. Caffeine is a drug. Drugs can be addictive beyo...

 I walked outside this morning to get some wood for the fireplace. I didn’t have a jacket because I was being lazy. Hmmmm….I thought…seems like it is warming up. It didn’t feel overly cold. I assumed it was probably around 45 degrees. It just felt a little chilly. Certainly not coat weather. The thermometer read 25 degrees. I guess the weather is toughening us up. My Monday was very Monday-ish. It dragged on and on and I took an hour break around dinner time to run to the store. When I got back, I took a few minutes to eat and then torture Paul a little. I really know how to push his buttons and irk him to amuse myself. Poor Paul. He took it well. I continued working and developed a headache. I think I am just fatigued from computing all day. Avery was able to help Papa make lasagne noodles from scratch for our holiday feast! Yum! 😋 

 Avery and Kendall spent the night. I made quiche for them this morning. Yum! Off they went to the next round of visiting they were doing. They were able to get some laundry done at our house too! Today was a day of chores. Normally I do cleaning, but things were looking decent. I did some planning, deep dive research for our trip in March. Mapping out where to visit, excursions to do and so forth. I found this lady that shares off the radar activities to do that are kind of neat. I made notes in my phone regarding some of them. I helped Paul bring more wood into the garage for the fireplace. While I was outside, I brought the dogs out to potty. Moe wanted to be out longer. He did have some good time exercising though. Ethan and Jiminy had some bro-time. Ethan was problem solving computer challenges. I am sure Jiminy was helping. Jiminy has a special way of lighting Ethan’s face up with a smile. I enjoy the week day routine of Jiminy get excited when he hears Ethan’s car. He whines...

 We had our Christmas party today. It was a smaller group. I plan out weird games and the prizes are lottery tickets.  I made up creative names like “Santa’s Suck” where you move m&m’s with a straw into a cup. Games that no one can really practice for. We put solo cups on our hands and moved marshmellows into a cup. That was also harder than expected. A few times the marshmellows stuck to the side of the cup.  Over all, I think the games were pretty inclusive and no real skill base was needed to play.  Everyone brought a snack to share and we had quite a spread! Bbq meatballs, buffalo chicken wing dip, cookies,  pigs in a blanket, Mac and cheese bites and more. Yum. Let the Christmas pounds collect even more around my mid section! Avery and Kendall spent the night. After everyone left, we played a game where you put apples in panty hose and put the pantyhose on your head. Then you try to knock over water bottles with the apples. That was a pretty silly game ...

 Our power went out briefly around 4:15 am. We have an air purifier AND a fan running for noise so we can sleep. The air purifier is LOUD. We call it the jet engine.  The power went out and things fell silent. Instant jolting awake.  Luckily it was a brief outrage due to weather. Avery is coming over today to help with some cleaning and to visit.kendall came as well. They both stayed for lunch. We chatted, laughed about things, solidified plans for Christmas and they got to open a present early.  Tomorrow is a family Christmas party. We don’t exchange gifts. We all put $10 in and buy lottery tickets. The lottery tickets are handed out as rewards for winning a game. My games require no skill and they are ridiculous.  I am excited. Our power went out again around 4 pm. It was out for a couple hours. I went out to get wood from the pile to move inside. It was pleasant out this morning, but chilly the afternoon. Paul stayed late at work every days this week. 😢 it w...

 We had a small “dog farts” situation today with Moe as he processed his large dinner from last night. I was asked today how Ethan was doing. I am glad to report (knock on wood) he is holding steady. It felt good to say. I said it cautiously. We have been in a good spot with him for a couple months (one time in a row). I finished my work today and headed into the vet office. We saw routine  appointments. One person that arrived was someone that I don’t care for. I avoid seeing this person. They are a nice person, but I just don’t like their personality. Some people are just not cohesive with our personalities. It was like when you see someone at the store that you want to avoid. You suddenly have to go in the opposite direction towards the produce, when you already shopped produce, just to get away. Luckily, I was able to steer clear of this person and continue happily. Just the thought of crossing paths freaked me out a little. What would my face have done? What would the con...

 There was an unfortunate (or fortunate if you have a dog’s point of view) incident that occurred this evening. I was a dumbass and left the pantry door open and went out to dinner with a friend. When I returned, the cover to the food bin was busted off and a large amount of food was missing. There was only one dog tall enough to pull this off and he was considerably fatter. He looked guilty too. He looked sad. Probably because he ate so much that he was uncomfortable.  I bet he will do it again at any given moment if he has the chance. All looks….no brains. No lessons learned. He will likely crap his brains out for the next 24 hours too. Ugh! He then felt very sorry for himself. Very sorry! He was antsy, he whined and tried different positions to get comfortable.  We did a heating pad on the belly, massage and lots of hugs. He knew something didn’t feel right. This fool better not keep me up all night because of his poor choices! We had two virtual holiday parties at wor...

 My blood was finally used from the donation last month. I do enjoy watching the “blood journey”. It was used on a patient in Utica. Cool! I hope it helps them heal! I worked at the vet clinic this evening. I worked with a girl that I have known since she was in tech school years ago. She has grown into quite a great tech. She is the one that I pick to clean my dog’s teeth.  I had the pleasure of watching her navigate an anesthetic event with her patient over the summer. She was quick, knew exactly what to do to support her patient and navigated things beautifully. Her patient did great (and so did she). It is really cool to see someone grow their skills, confidence and into being an adult over the past 8-9 years! I am proud of her! Ethan had the dogs fed and walked when I got home from work. I was thankful for that. Thanks kid! Not looking forward to the mess outside as the weather warms up over the next few days. It is going to get muddy and gross. Ugh…..so many paws to wipe...

 Today was a day of problem solving. One work issue happened after another. I did get a strongly worded letter from another team as I advised someone to do something (I was following directions from someone else) and apparently it wasn’t allowed. Whoops! I did take Moe out in the field and let him run off some energy. He needed that. He slept for the remainder of the afternoon afterward. I made little Ferguson a ramp for our outdoor stairs out of snow. His is over 14 and can’t see out of one of his eyes. His depth perception is off. The side walk is slippery. I have now started placing him on the ground outside to avoid slipping on the stairs. He is a tough old guy. Paul came home and promptly shoveled the ramp away. I didn’t tell him about it. Poor Ferguson. I will continue to be his uber for safe pottying. Tomorrow will be a long day. I work at the Vet office after work. As my mom would say,  I am getting out of the house “to blow the stink off”.  A saying I have passed...

 Paul and I had a leisurely Sunday morning. We laughed at the dogs and sipped coffee. Later Paul shared that he was feeling a little funny. He said he was feeling “whacked out”. “Maybe it is the coffee?” I proposed. I have been mixing our normal coffee with a little bit of espresso each day (since Thanksgiving) just to use up the bag of espresso. I haven’t noticed too much difference but Paul immediately accused me of “trying to kill” him. Seems a bit dramatic to me. “How am I supposed to know you can’t drink espresso like a real Italian man?” I asked.  Cue the Italian swear words and the hands flying in the air…and I just sinisterly giggled. I didn’t realize the coffee was causing him difficulty. I am not a mind reader and today was the first time in two weeks he has mentioned it. I will avoid adding the espresso….except if he pisses me off…..ha ha just kidding…..ish. We went to a friends house to watch the Bill’s game with the “gang”. Yay! Bill’s won.  I don’t pay too m...

 Phew! I slept the off the asshole cloud that surrounded me yesterday. Thank goodness.  I spent the day getting my life in order. I put items in the freezer for food prep, prepared herb ice cubes with leftover herbs (thyme, cilantro, parsley) things I knew were going to go bad.  I made some cookie. I had a counter surfer just waiting for the right moment for me to turn my back. Luckily I am a pro (today) and he didn’t get the opportunity to help himself.  He was trying to “play it cool”. I knew what he was doing! I cooked up the rest of the bacon and placed it in the freezer for adding to broccoli side dishes, quiche and more.  Most needed of all, I spent the day by myself. Thinking, cleaning, getting things orderly. I puttered. Wrapped presents, bathed the dogs, changed the sheets, typical weekend projects.  By the end of the day, I felt so much better and accomplished. Ethan and Paul were off doing their own things today. They stayed out of my way and I s...

 I had a complete meltdown this morning. The entire day I was a curmudgeon! My meltdown was obnoxious. I couldn’t even stand myself for it. If I were anyone else, I would have punched me in the face. I had a physical therapy appointment at 7 am. I was ready. I went to go start my car and was disgusted with the process. How do people do this every day! How did I do this everyday.  Walk outside in the cold, start the car. Ugh! Trudge back in and wait. Brush the snow off, more cold. How stupid! I have really become so appreciative of not leaving the house. Poor Paul heard my mouth start running about ridiculous things. “The physical therapist should be required to come to the house when it is below a certain temperature.” - not the most efficient business plan. “It should be illegal for people to have to leave their homes if there is snow!” -ridiculous rule, I know. “ This is the worst!” - seriously, I have been through far worse….this is not the “worst!” “This is my last time go...

 As a Vet Tech I often will get pictures of various parts of friends pets asking for my thoughts on things.  Sometimes I get diarrhea pics, sometimes I get vomit pics, sometimes it is wounds…..today it was animal crotch pics. I received two animal crotch pics from two different people. I don’t mind receiving these in the least. When I get them, it helps me feel useful and  like I am helping in some way.  One of the male crotch pictures was sent for me to identify the gender of a cat, the other pic was to evaluate an incision (which didn’t look all that good-I made some recommendations). What was the most fun, was telling Paul I received two “dick pics” from two different people just to see what his face did as he processed that information. He sounded like an owl when I told him. “Who?….. Who?” He said I did video the event. Here are some lousy screen shots from my showering of information on him. I ordered a pair of water shoes for myself that were on sale. The pair...

 Tuesday morning, there was a mass break in of cars at Avery’s apartment complex. Avery’s car was “hit” by robbers. The lady at the apartment complex called me. I saw her name pop up on my phone and answered immediately. She let me know what was happening and that she was unable to reach Avery. She told me that she suspected Avery’s car was left with the door open and suggested she do an inventory of her things, and call the police if anything was stolen or damaged. She didn’t want to touch anything. I was able to connect with Avery. She went out and found her door wide open. Nothing was missing except $25. She kept that in her car “just in case”. There was no damage. She did share that it felt violating that people were just going through her stuff. We were very grateful that the cost of this robbery was only $25. The thieves could have smashed windows, broken locks and really screwed up the cars. 45 cars were hit in the complex keeping the police very busy I am sure. It was and i...

 Today my coping skills of avoidance really kicked in. I have a work issue  that I haven’t been dealing with because avoiding it is easier. One of my co-workers pointed out that it should be dealt with.  It could go either way for me. I don’t see resolution on the horizon even if I do try to tackle the issue.  My coworkers is so passionate about it, I don’t think she is capable of letting the issue die. I don’t see it an efficient use of my time. So for now,I am going to continue to avoid, until I feel the appropriate support is in place for me to tackle the issue. So that’s fun. Maybe tomorrow? I was able to meal prep tonight. I made some lemon chicken as well as stuff chicken wrapped in bacon. Yum! Paul went to bowling and I puttered around the house picking away at chores. Totally non-exciting day. Just the way I like them to be.

 It was a busy Monday today. I kept a list of things for me to stay on task. Some days that works better than others. Today was a pretty good day for checking off the boxes. Yay! After work, I grabbed my large order of groceries from one store, made my weekly stop at the Liquor store to support my community small business and purchase a box of Paul’s support wine. Stopped at the third store and went back home. I can do all of this and be home in less than 45 minutes. I put groceries away, had to do a few more work related emails. I was able to slice up some chicken breasts and beat them to prepare for tomorrow’s dinner. I am going to rolle up some broccoli and cheese and wrap it in bacon. This will not be a safe meal for Ethan. But I am excited for how it will turn out. Avery and Kendall stopped by in the evening. Avery needed to pick up her car because Paul took it, lubed it, placed snow tires on it. Acts of love. Avery has her finals later in the week. She was pleased that she wa...

 Sadly, Sarah and my shopping weekend came to an end. Boo! The staff was chomping at the bit for us to leave as we finished our last show on HGTV. They even knocked on our door 10 minutes before we checked out, seeing if we had left. We left on time and weren’t late. I came home, unpacked the car, showered, did laundry, mopped, vacuumed all prior to going to the light parade in Brockport. Work hard, play hard. We arrived at the meeting spot for the parade and our friends were on their way. Avery and Kendall met us there as well. Ethan decided he wanted to go with us. I believe this is the first time Ethan has attended this parade since 2019. He has been trying to avoid crowds but also has some mental health things he has been working on for the past 5 years. It was so exciting having him there. Small baby step wins! It is a sign of progress! Yay! He hung out with kids his own age there. Kids he has grown up with but withdrew from. It was small….but such a big deal! We watched the p...

 Sarah and I woke up super early due to our early bedtime. Ha!  The hotel provided breakfast. It was actually pretty yummy! We decided to go to the mall. I have not been to a mall is years. This mall is the fancy mall in Rochester. It wasn’t too crowded which was nice. Everything was decorated and cheerful. One may use the word Merry! We stopped at a few shops, browsed and even found some good deals to take advantage of.  We made our way down to the exciting world of goat snuggling. They can have all my money. It was worth every penny. You walk up to the goat and scoop it up. I rotated goats and snuggled them to sleep. More importantly, we didn’t stop smiling the entire time. We helped the small children by placing goats on their laps. We were feeding them. There were a couple naughty goats that were chewing on Sarah’s hair. A couple tried nibbling on my purse. There was one lady goat the was a bully. She was head butting me in my back with its small nubbin horns. It was ...

 Zero more sleeps to the most wonderful time of the yes….you can sing that to the Christmas tune. Today is the day! Today kicks off the shopping weekend. Our gift to each other celebrating a friendship that started over 20 years ago as Sarah walked into the vet hospital as my new co-worker. We quickly bonded. Two little introverts with a sick sense of humor. Yay! I started the day by reading  a funny little blurb by someone saying:  “I don’t know how much Tylenol my Mom took but I hate crowds,  small talk, people who don’t stand on. I will die before I believe anyone over my gut instinct. I also talk to animals and have a favorite spoon.” I laughed. I agreed. Ha! We are all on the spectrum in our own ways.  Obviously I talk to AND for animals. They also have their own voices. Totally normal.  I have a favorite spoon. I actually have a favorite spoon for eating certain foods. I have a soup spoon, cereal spoon and yogurt spoon. They are all different. I also ...

 I woke up this morning excited for my shopping weekend, which started today. Nope! My brain played an evil trick on me when I realized it was Thursday instead of Friday.  What a jerk my brain is! It is my karma being served to me. Last night Paul used the bathroom and I slipped a plastic baby into his wine glass. He was sipping away at his wine for about 30 minutes until the plastic baby touched his lips. He had a grandiose and hysterical reaction. The best part was that I was on autopilot when I did it and had forgotten all about it. Yep! I guess I deserved the trick my brain played on me.  I like to make sure Paul is always on his toes. It keeps him young. I don’t want to be married to an old fart! 💨 who has time for that. I caught Moe sleeping today with his tongue out. I wondered if humans did this. I am certain it is only someone with an XY chromosome would have this happen. It isn’t very lady like to do this as a lady. Of a lady did do this…..deny deny deny! Altho...

 It has been 11ish months since “the incident” with Moe and Jiminy. We have done formal training and been hyper diligent regarding any food and treats. Moe can only have food or treats while separated from the others. My family wanted to give up on Moe. I don’t blame them. Jiminy is our prized little perfect pup. I just couldn’t give up on Moe at that time. Fundamentally he was/is a “good” dog. Some dogs are just wired wrong and are dangerous. Moe is extremely cautious but once you have gained his trust, he shows his silly and loving side. I am proud of how far Moe has come. He has been quite the project. He still needs work. He was able to be around family at Thanksgiving. There was only one growling incident that was corrected immediately. Of course it was with a man that he didn’t know. We will never be to a point where we can leave him unattended in our yard like Phineas. We have to protect Moe by not putting him in that position. Today I walked in the den and found him resting...

 With my position as a recruiter, it never ceases to amaze me what people say during an interview.  I spoke with someone yesterday in a different part of the country that had been in the industry for 9 months. “I pretty much have done it all” they said. Knowing this is not the case, I started to assess their skill level.  “Have you drawn blood?”  I asked. “No” “Have you monitored anesthesia?” I asked “No” “Do you understand medical shorthand, terms like BID or NPO?” I asked “No” This tracks, as someone with this minimal experience has not “done it all” in 9 months. It takes about 5 years to become what is considered as “skilled”. I am 28 years in and have NOT “done it all”. This person asked for the highest wage offered within the range without the experience to back it up. We discussed financial expectations with pay and that the high end of the pay scale was for someone that has learned the skills previously mentioned. It is a fine line for setting expectations and...

 December 1 st.  We start the decent upon Christmas with scents of cinnamon and pine swirling around. Those are the scents in my tart warmer.  Monday’s after a holiday weekend are rough. Things are still pretty rough at work. I do find myself saying bad words, becoming snippy and wonder who the genius is behind the decisions that make things harder for me. I try to hide all of it and save the complaining for Paul. What a lucky man! Ethan and I got talking about a local family that lost their entire home to a house fire yesterday. They live not too far from us. Luckily, no one was hurt.  We all have things that are sentimental to us. I can’t imagine losing all of them in one day. I can’t imagine the celebration of no one getting hurt. It was a good chat to have with Ethan as he expressed his empathy for the situation. I was able to get some chores done tonight. They are overdue.  The countdown has begun for our big Patti and Sarah shopping weekend. We tell our hu...

 We celebrated my Mom’s birthday with brunch this morning. My brother and sister in law came as well as Ethan and Avery. Brunch was delicious.  We then went back to my Mom’s house for cake and ice cream. We decorated their Christmas tree and visited for a bit. It was a nice morning. Afterward, Ethan had his buddy over and they went out to do target practice. Don’t worry, they had a proper “stop” so no one would get hurt. I don’t even know if that is what it is called. They had something that would prevent bullets from traveling a mile and killing someone the next country block over. We put up our Christmas tree and we decorated it. Avery grabbed some decorations for her apartment. I hit a wall and needed to sit quietly for a few hours. This is my time to rebuild up energy before my full day of talking tomorrow.  Paul built a fire and had some chores he needed to do. The dogs were happy to have us home. They aren’t typically home alone very often. They were full of it. I b...

 Today we gathered at the in-laws and did our annual trek to Pittsford Dairy. The smell of this place alone is what holiday candles try to capture.  All the Christmas trees are stacked and placed neatly creating small walkways  which felt like you were in the Forest. We did some Christmas photos. Jiminy also had some photos taken. He did have a few people come up and pet him too. We got to see some family and honorary family members. In fact we ate dinner with most of them. It is always good to catch up with family and honorary family. We helped Nana and Papa put up their Christmas tree. We decorated it and enjoyed making a balanced tree. We had to get going because the dogs had been home alone for a very long time.  A good day was had by all.