Ethan’s Journey

I really feel some people are placed in my life to teach me something. Some are excellent and I want to be more like them. Others are horrific and I wonder why I had to even cross paths with them. I have wonderful role models for friends, and others that are someone that I used to know. Ions ago, I had a boss that was awful. Unfair, narcissistic, and a lot stirrer at best. At the time I wondered why such a person would be in a leadership position. I walked away from that position defeated. It took months to recover from.  Years later I would discover that I didn’t like the way they spoke to me. I didn’t like their tone. I didn’t like the way they worded things. I didn’t like their negativity. I certainly didn’t like the way they had a knack for making me feel stupid. It has led me to be more thoughtful about my interactions with people. I never want to make someone feel the way that person made me feel. I had a coworker share some excellent feedback with me today. It had me reflect...

 All day felt like a Monday to me. So I was off a little bit.  The hospital called to go over prep for Thursday’s appointment. As they were telling me everything, I asked if he was getting bloodwork. This is our first annual exam in Rochester. She was really friendly and nice. She was patient with my questions and I liked her kindness. The lady said “nope” and I asked “why”? She couldn’t give me an answer, but just said he “wasn’t on the schedule” for bloodwork. I had the gut feeling something was going to be missed and pressed a little more. I explained that typically at his annual Ethan would get extensive bloodwork. Since we were new to this facility, I asked when all of his extensive screening would be done, that has historically done at his annual exam, just so I could understand this new timeline/process. They shared they would be putting in an IV ( what a perfect time to collect blood and save Ethan a poke). After more pressing, I was given 3 numbers to a Transplant Nur...

 What a long day. I had a boatload of meetings today. It was nice to look at the beautiful glass like state of the lake. It was a perfect temperature to work in. Another day with a lazy co-worker. I had a couple breaks every few hours to run inside and get the camper ready for relocation. We are taking it for the weekend to the in-laws in preparation for the epic “Cousins” Weekend. Cousins Weekend is where family gets together, along with non family that is considered family. We eat, watch the cousins mingle, play bocce, swim, enjoy a campfire, drink and be merry. It is spent with lots of fun people that we don’t get to see very often. It is a highlight of our summer. We worked and packed, worked and packed. We finally were off “like a prom dress” around 5:30. Our drive was mostly uneventful. We did hear a loud thud of something the hit the camper above the truck cab. We assumed it was a bird. Poor bird. We arrived at the in-laws around 9:00 pm. We were dropping the camper off and ...

 Happy birthday to me! What a great day I had.  This morning the weather was calm, lake was smooth and it was warm. Thank’s Mother Nature! I had my coffee and talked to my mom on the phone. While I was on the phone, I was scanning the ground. Grass, clover, dandelions, more grass, and then I saw a 4-leaf clover. Wow! It brought me luck all day. My dad was really good at finding them. Paul went out and got me some breakfast treats. Yum!  We took the dogs for a run. To be clear, I was not running, but we let them off leash. They run really far ahead and I call them back. We practice the command “come” (don’t have a dirty mind) and they end up running twice as far. Penny runs the most. She goes 0-100 in less than 3 seconds. After we tired the dogs out, we prepared to go out on the boat. There wasn’t a cloud in the sky. Penny wasn’t overly tired, so we had to decide if she could go with us or not. We finally decided YES, and Penny was so happy. The trouble with taking a “not ...

 Today started out like another Saturday should. I slept in. It was until about 6:30 am, but I woke up on my own accord. When I rolled out of bed, I took the dogs for a walk up the street. They get to be off leash. Moe and Penny go hog wild but have really good recall. We are just working on “come” and “sit”. Jiminy and Ferguson were also off leash, and were running along with no care in the world. We went out on the boat. We went to our favorite little cove. All 4 dogs came. We parked the boat and sat in the sun and got nice and warm. I went in swimming in my tube and paddled around a bit. Then I gave all three little dogs a bath. They were so hot, I think they welcomed the coolness of the lake. As I was handing Jiminy back to Paul, Moe decided to jump in onto my tube. That didn’t go well for him. The water was belly button deep or more. He panicked for a second. But I held onto him. Since he was already in the water…he got a bath too.  He swam a little bit to get the shampoo...

 Today was a good day. It started a little rough with Paul’s extremely loud alarm going off right above my head. I was scared awake. Moe was extra full of it and decided to walk himself  and blast out the door this morning. Work seemed to crawl by. Second by second I inched to the finish line.  FINALLY! The day was over. My bird feeder is so fun.   Avery called and was excited to share that she went to U of R. She and her professor had the privilege of using their electron microscope to look at the particles they have been working on making. Avery loved the experience. She also had to do a 2 minute speech in front of the rest of the people participating in their summer research projects. Her professor takes pictures for me. I love that and can’t wait to meet her professor in person some day. We wrapped our day up and I was so tired. The back is feeling a little bit better.

 Paul and I traveled up to our little slice of heaven today. All 4 dogs and rabbit in our truck, plus our food and clothes. I worked, Jiminy supervised, and the rest of the animals slept. Moe and Penny buddied up and were looking out the window for a bit. They were guarding us and barking at the homeless people begging for money on the corner. Ferguson was naughty today and biting Moe. At some point he is going to have his ass handed to him. What a chihuahua. We arrive at camp mid morning. It was windy but the temperature was pleasant. After work, Moe was introduced to his new friend, Charlie. Charlie is a golden retriever and is bigger than Moe.  Moe seemed apprehensive. We did an activity with the two dogs and walked up the road. Charlie was being a goofball and hiding in the tall grass and then popping out. This peeked Moe’s curiosity. Moe continues to put his hackles up around Charlie, but this little game seemed to engage Moe. Moe finally ended up chasing Charlie.  I...

 Results came back from the kidney biopsy. On a cellular level, there was no change. Ethan still has the autoimmune disorder but it has stayed the same. His kidney values have elevated but the doctor is now saying she wants to see what happens in the next 3 months and how things trend. This is good news, but it was also frustrating news, especially for Ethan. We asked about his fatigue and were told that since it is such a vague symptom, there really wasn’t much they could do about that. Ethan felt like he was walking away from the meeting with the message “you’re just going to have to be fatigued forever.” He was frustrated that he feels like the doctors are letting this kidney decline and aren’t being proactively trying to slow the progression. We see the numbers climbing slowly but we have to wait for “trends”. We will play the game. Repeat labs in September, see where things stand then. In the mean time, Ethan is not happy. He was hoping to get out on a medication that would he...

 Invisible fence came today to troubleshoot my collar and help me train Moe to it. I thanked my last week self for deciding to do this. Moe did his normal greeting of barking (he has a beagle bark) and putting his hackles up. Moe did really well with training and we have some homework to work on. Today was the first day I let him stay out of his crate while I worked, without a leash on. He loved getting into the toy bin and didn’t seem to want to destruct the toys. He then got tired and took a nap on his bed (that Jiminy was guarding half the morning and wouldn’t allow him access). Dog behavior is so funny. Jiminy was standing his ground while in the bed, but as soon as he got up and laid in a different bed, Moe laid in the first bed and Jiminy joined him. What? That’s not fair. Jiminy was setting his boundary. Moe respected it to. He seems like a polite dog as far as coexisting with the others. I was able to set my bird feeder up after work. It took some finesse trying to get it i...

 Life at the ER last night was a bit of a dumpster fire. Everything just went from bad to worse. It wasn’t the patients, they were all mostly good dogs and cats. Some of the things that came in were just odd. We had a mountain of laundry chest high. I don’t like that I work so sporadically that things move and change. I forget how to navigate portions of the software. I feel stupid a lot of the time. I have a lady that I work with who is so kind and wonderful. I enjoy her company and feel comfortable asking her for help.  It is a good exercise for me because I don’t like asking for help. This forces me to grow and develop part of myself that I will need to rely on at some point.  My back was really angry by the time I got home. It was clunking when I moved or stretched. I had the heated seat on all the way home and then I slept on an ice pack. It is feeling slightly better. I rested this evening. Poor Ethan asked me for help with a few things and I just couldn’t. I polite...

 Moe was a great sleeping buddy. He barely moved AND slept in this morning.  My back is really sore today. I iced it, took Tylenol, did lots of stretching and yoga. Still hurts. Ut oh. I had my 12 hour shift coming up, this is going to suck. I decided to rest it. I did take the dogs for a walk (motions lotion) after icing it for a while. I will do what I can and hope for the best from there. My cousin, Andy, came over with the coolest birthday gift. It is a bird feeder with a camera in it. I can’t wait to set it up. I was flattered at how incredibly thoughtful this was. We both excitedly put it together and I planned where I was going to place it outside. I want to have it within sight of my work space. He also wanted access to the camera so that he could see the birds too. I loved that. I am so thankful we get to camp together and go on a trip to Aruba. It’s about sharing experiences. I can’t wait to get it up and running. Avery and I have a good conversation this morning abo...

It’s Saturday chores day. I’m did many chores and was a successful adult. I was excited because I was invited to a party that many of my previous coworkers were at. I looked forward to it. As the time got closer, I grew more excited. It was finally time to leave. I saw and connected with several coworkers. It was so good to catch up with them and hear about all the exciting things going on in their lives. One’s  getting married at a destination location. It happened to be where Paul and I went on our honeymoon. One was recently married with a destination wedding. One was a recent kidney donor. Her recipient is doing well and she had a pretty smooth recovery. One has small children and it was fun to hear about how they are growing up. They are becoming little comedians and keeping her entertained. One has a new pup and I liked hearing about all the things the pup was learning. This little baby is the cutest little thing too! There was a food truck and ice cream truck. Everything was...

 I woke up and walked down stairs this morning. Ethan was almost ready to leave for work. He said to me quickly, “Hey, just so you know, Liam is downstairs and spent the night.” I was so thankful for the heads up. I could see myself being startled and stabbing him or something terrible.  I met up with a long time friend this morning. We met a this cute little diner in Henrietta called Sunny’s diner. The food was really yummy. The service was great! Our waitress was on the ball. I was happy to visit with my name twin. We caught up with things going on in our lives. My back started becoming sore today. I could feel it all day. It’s not bad but it is noticeable. I am hoping to take it a little easy tomorrow. Going into the night shift, Sunday night, will be terrible with a sore back. I did a bunch of stretching, took some Tylenol and a muscle relaxer, fingers crossed that breaks the cycle. I made a lot of progress with Mossimo off leash today. He is eager to please. He is very go...

 Jiminy is getting braver every day!  Today Avery and I had a dentist appointment. We love our dentist’s office. Everything went smooth as usual. The dental industry really has their stuff together. They schedule appropriately. They are typically on time, and my dental hygienist is so fun to be around. Ethan came home from work and immediately mowed the front lawn. Woah! That was amazing. He just did it without being asked. We were able to get a video visit for Ethan’s follow up kidney appointment. This is awesome because we were able to schedule it for noon, which is when his lunch is. He can go to the car to do it. I plan to meet Ethan that day. We can both listen to what the doctor says and see how she wants to move forward. I did some more work with Mossimo. He is learning to sit and come. He does not do these things if food is not involved. We also are using a zap collar, on mostly a vibration setting. He is confused and will just sit and stay where ever he is if he gets ...

 I woke up crabby. There was no particular reason, I slept well, but when I opened my eyes, I felt exhausted. I closed them and laid there for a while maybe in a light sleep state. I forced myself to get up. Well this feeling isn’t ideal. I like being a morning person usually. I let the dogs out and started working. I had a hair appointment at 9:00 am. I drove to my appointment but the door was locked. The lights were off. I remembered my hairdresser has another job she works at in the mornings. Phooey! I recorded the appointment wrong. Soooo….when is my actual appointment I wondered. I texted my hair dresser and she said it was actually at 2:45. Crap! Hope I don’t have any appointments at that time. Luckily I didn’t. We had to meet with the social security office today. They were about 15 minutes late. The appointment was an hour long. Thank goodness I was there. They wanted doctor names, past and future appointment times, medications Ethan was taking etc. he never would have reme...

 We arrived at the hospital at 7:00 am. The surgical center was hopping. They took Ethan back and prepped him. They then came and got me. I told Ethan that if at anytime he felt more comfortable having me there, he could ask for me and tell them I am his advocate. I felt comfortable that he could handle things on his own. As I was waiting, there was a lady watching videos at full volume on her phone. Apparently she didn’t get the memo about how annoying this was to everyone around her. Trying to focus on work with obnoxious music and clearly some sort of person swimming and screaming was not ideal. Why are there people like this? She also started reading news articles out loud to her friend. She also was watching ads about “clearing out stuck poop”. The waiting room was small and I couldn’t get away. Grrrr! I know I am sensitive to noise but almost every person in the waiting room had their ringer on. Every text message would ping them. The volume turned up as loud as possible. Som...

 Today was quite busy for me. I sifted through a pile of emails. I attended my meetings and picked away at the mountain of tasks I needed to do. It was so warm and humid out. Yuck! My hair was revolting to the humidity. I decided I didn’t want to take the dogs for a walk due to the heat. Moe decided that he was going to slip the leash out of my hand and take himself for a walk. I was running after him at my top speed (which isn’t very fast) in flip flops. Not ideal. He disappeared on me and I tried to cut through the mowed middle path of our field to head him off. He wasn’t there. Then I ran back and saw him way in the distance, but still on our property and on the path we have walked so many times. By this point we were both tired, and he happily trotted along next to me while I held the leash. His tongue was out as far as it could go. He was proud of himself. After all, he just wanted to go for a walk. He was going to our normal walking spot, like a good boy. I put him in his cra...

 All refreshed with a beautiful weekend at the lake. Now heading back to reality tomorrow. A long Monday of meetings. A week full of appointments.  Avery drove home for me because she is a great kid. I was able to get so much work done and prepare for the Monday run of meetings. Ethan starts week two of his work/study job. Last week was a lot of math. We will see what this week holds for him.  He was given shirts to wear that make him look official. We unloaded from our trip and I allowed Moe to walk around the house with a leash attached. Really I was making sure he didn’t mark anywhere. He has done that twice so far. I don’t want to give him the opportunity again. Liam was over and Moe didn’t growl at him. Progress!  I got the flags to set up to start training Moe to invisible fence. Once I get the flags in the ground we can work on learning the boundaries. I think he will be a much happier dog being off leash. I am thankful he is good motivated. I visited with my ...

 We had another perfect day at the lake. It was warm and sunny with minimal wind. We went out on the boat over to our little cove that we like to go.  While the adults were on the boat, Paul towed 4 of the girls on the tube with the jetski.  We anchored at the cove waiting for Paul and the girls to finish up their exciting tubing adventure and we were surprised when he showed up so quickly. Our neighbor showed up and we tied up to his boat too. The girls were laughing and excitedly talking loud. The jet ski was going pretty slow. We then realized that the tube had a hole in it and had been deflating at a quick pace. One of the girls wasn’t even on the float and was just holding on to it. We swam around for a few hours. I had my tube that I was floating around on. The water was very pleasant. I am a pretty tough critic of the lake temperature too. When we were done, we loaded all the girls onto our boat and our neighbor’s boat so we could all get back. Paul worked hard wit...

 If I could clone today, I would. The weather was perfect. We spent time in the water, took the dogs for multiple walks, ate well and enjoyed the teen girl energy spread amongst the 6 teenage girls we have at camp this weekend.  Sarah and I floated on tubes and chatted for a while. We needed to catch up and have some alone time. We paddled around in water that was about waist deep for a bit. We participated in rock painting, the girls played Scattergories for a while this afternoon, the girls got to go tubing, and even the rabbit was sunbathing. Paul, Sarah, John and I left the girls behind and headed over to the cove on the jetski’s. We took a small cooler and spent time enjoying the clear water. The sun warmed the water up nicely. When we came back, we ate and started a campfire. We roasted marshmallows and made s’mores. Yum! The sunset was beautiful. It looked like a painting. We played Cards Against Humanity at the campfire.

 I had an intense work day today. Lots of interviews and meetings. We left for camp. Ethan and Liam were left to “man” the house.  Avery drove so I could work in the car. Rachel came with us and our destination was camp. We arrived and Sarah and her family arrived shortly after. We have 6 teenage girls between the two families. Moe did well meeting new people today. He only growled at Rachel, but now they are friends. Moe met Sarah’s dog, Quinn on a walk and they coexisted very well. It is all good socialization for Moe. I realized that Moe does barrel rolling when faced with situations he is uncomfortable with. For example, Avery was trying to wipe his feet and he was rolling and mouthy during it.  We talked about just letting his feet be wet for now until we can get our electric collar up and running for some intense training. I ordered the batteries and charging cord this week, so  once those arrive I can start.  I also ordered the flags for invisible fence t...

 We had “severe weather” today. I was not impressed with how lackluster these storms were. Our house (side of the road) was being dramatic and lost power from a little bit of wind. Our neighbors across the street had power. They were taunting us with their lights on as we drove down to my mom’s house to steal her power. It rained, there was a little bit of thunder and apparently a tornado was spotted at one point. The scene put my window was boring and just a storm. I did find it rather exciting to have the prospect of seeing a tornado come through. How cool would that be? Of course ideally there would be zero damage. I am not asking for a lot…just a good storm! The greatness of the day mixed with the lull of the rain made me sleepy. It made the dogs sleepy too. They were sleep bragging, letting me know how much they were enjoying their slumber by their little snores. Jerks. All warm and snuggling while I am slaving away so we can afford THEIR food. Ha! Avery used some vegetables w...

 Happy Birthday to my brother, Brian!  I still continued to dig myself out from the vacation punishment. It’s fine, slow and steady. I confirmed Ethan’s appointment for kidney biopsy for next Tuesday. They said to plan on being there for 8 hours. Ugh! I noticed they didn’t schedule a follow up visit so I did have to call about that and am waiting for a response.  Ethan said he did a lot of math today. He said it was a little boring, but I think it will be fun to watch the growth from week to week and the pride Ethan will have when he can make stuff. Jacob’s mom reached out yesterday. Jacob is the kid with his second heart transplant that went horrible wrong. She is struggling with trying to give her son independence at the same time he is so needy.  It is such a hard time they are going through. Luckily not too many people can identify, because it is pretty crappy. Jacob is doing great physically. He is able to use both legs bus still is in intensive therapy for his ...

 Ethan was up bright and early. He left with plenty of time to make it to his new job on time (which in our family is early…unless you are Paul). I received my vacation punishment by mounds of emails, plenty of meetings to attend and schedule for tomorrow and new openings. Ahhhh! Job security! When Ethan arrived home, he seemed in good spirits and even chatted a little about his day. He has 3 or 4 other people in his class. One was out with Covid today.  Ahhh. I told him to stay away from that one with the biopsy coming up. They got a tour of the machine shop and did some classroom work. It wasn’t the typical first day class because the instructor was on PTO last week and wasn’t quite ready. Ethan liked that the classroom was air conditioned.  The shop wasn’t but he said there were so many fans running that it wasn’t too bad. Avery met a friend for dinner. I like that she loves her adult life and freedom. She is just thriving. She has this week off from her research proje...

 We arrived home today. Well….most of us. Paul is commuting to his work in the morning. He had some things he wanted to finish up. Paul goes on vacation to get his projects done. He does things like wax the camper. Ethan arrived home by 10:30 am. He had an early start. He said he hated leaving because he had fun. Avery drove home while I started to play catch up with work. 242 emails. That was with me checking it daily and only answering the urgent ones. Worst part about coming home and going back to work is playing catch up. Ethan is gearing up to start his apprenticeship tomorrow. He is worried that his doctor’s appointments will screw things up for him. Avery came home and made a wonderful meal. Fettuccine with homemade Alfredo sauce, broccoli, Italian sausage, mushrooms, and garlic. Yum! She is taking some to share with her friend tomorrow. Liam was helpful unloading groceries today. It is nice having him around. Such a nice kid.

 Last full day of vacation. It was not a disappointment. The weather was warm and the sun was shining. We did more of the same. Eat, go out on the boat, drink, eat shimmy in a few dog walks and a sunset with campfire. While we were out on the boat, Ethan and I went on a walk along the shore. I found a femur bone of some large animal. Ethan found some sea glass. Avery floated around on her noodle. The water was warm and we spent well over an hour in it. Ethan and Paul went on the jet ski’s to look for a dunked barge. They didn’t find it but suspect it was under a bunch of weeds. It had sunk a long time ago. Ethan and I went on a walk up the road looking for monarch butterfly eggs on the milkweed. We found multiple suspected eggs and will see what happens when they hatch. We took Moe and Rubi for a walk together. They have had a little beef, so we tried an activity. The activity of a walk was distracting enough that they were coexisting very well. The found a dead woodchuck. That was...

 Today was even more perfect out. Sunny, slight breeze, warm lake water! YES! I was frustrated when I took the dogs for a walk and there was so much traffic it wasn’t enjoyable. I said several bad words.  Mossimo had another lake bath. He didn’t love it.  We floated around in tubes, waded out extra far, looking for cool stuff in the water. We went out on the boat and paddled around a cove for a while. No one else was there so that was ideal! Ethan took out the jetski. Today is Avery and Andy’s birthday. I took Avery to the Cottag bakery. She picked out some cup cakes to try. Yum! We knew it was going to rain over night, so we picked everything up and stored it in the boat house to avoid being soaked.  As we were sitting around the fire, the power went out. It went out, out. There were 2000 homes without power. Apparently there was a transformer fire on one of the islands and that wiped out the power for about 10 hours. It was very sticky and hot. We all sleep with a ...

 Happy 4 th of July! Today we celebrated with lots of yummy snacks and food! We lounged the morning away. I took the dogs for a couple of lengthy walks. I took Moe in the water. He goes in up to his arm pits and then decides he is done. Ethan caught a snake. Just like when he was little. Some things you never grow out of. He held it for a while and then released it back where he found it. The weather was beautiful! Warm, sunny with a slight breeze. Paul and I took the jetski’s to Wilson bay. We were met with the rest of the crew on a pontoon boat. We tied up with a friends boat.  We swam, had beverages, swam some more. I floated in a tube. It was marvelous. We had lots of people watching to keep us busy. The girl’s with minimal swim suits,  the families with cute babies and the one little girl doing flips off her parents boat. Ethan opted not to go so he could plan out his fireworks display. When we were finished there, we came back for more snacks. Some fiends of ours ca...

 1 full week with Mossimo. He has been doing well. He is comfortable around all 4 of us. He has met several new people and dogs. Today he practiced going off leash. He nailed his recall until he smelled something really good in a culvert pipe. He had to go back on leash after that. The 4 musketeers went on several walks together today. Moe went in the lake. He wasn’t really swimming, he likes to wade in the water. We went to the thrift store this morning at the kids request. We have done this the past several years. Ethan found a container that he will use to raise his monarchs. Avery found a knife block for her knives at school. I found some goofy items that I purchased cheaply to hide in my cousin, Andy’s, camper. Diane is a reader, so I got a normalish looking book, then two other wacky books. I found a pot holder that said “Diane’s Kitchen” with a vintage design on it. What are the odds? She may even find it useful. I also found the oddest coffee mug that I was going to blend a...