Ethan’s Journey

 The sun was out today!!!!!! Yay!!!! Sunshine is good for the soul. My stomach has been in knots about this new part time gig I am starting. I have never worked in emergency medicine. Today I did a fasting to reset my gut. My gut gets cranky when I am anxious. I wonder where Avery gets her ball of nerves? My shift is 6 pm to 6 am. I am a morning person, so this could get interesting at about 8 pm….when I normally skip happily off to bed. I have a plan for a sleeping schedule. My worry is mostly that I won’t know the drug calculations, I don’t know how to do certain things…but mostly that I just don’t know. I like to know. I like to master things. I won’t know things and I don’t like that.  I chose to do this for a couple reasons. One is to learn. This is a growth project I have chosen. This is a networking project. This is pushing me outside of my comfort zone. This is to entertain my brain and sharpen my skill set which is rusty, since I have been out of clinic for a year and...

 I had a few meetings then popped over to the emergency clinic to help with inventory. I met a couple new coworkers. I am hoping I would have several people more experienced than me on a shift so that I can observe for a bit before jumping in. I know for sure one girl does not have any emergency experience either and we will be working together. Well….it will be an experience, that’s for sure. I had a few more meetings and now I am scrambling to set things up with my new territory. I am wondering if this will be a temporary or permanent solution. I went to dinner with a friend. We chatted for a few hours.I had a delicious margarita! It was pretty too! Avery set up an appointment for herself because she feels like her anxiety is not controlled. I will do my best to help Avery get what she needs.

 It’s funny how when you get used to a routine with the pharmacy how you just rely on that. When the person you ALWAYS talk to doesn’t answer the phone, it gets messy.  I got a different lady on the phone today and requested a refill on all of Ethan’s eligible medications. Some are a 30 day supply, some 60, some 90. My request was simple. “I need to get refills for the medications that are eligible for refill.” She said “you can’t just make that blanket statement.” She was a bit pissy when she said it. The funny thing is, my regular lady is very helpful and goes through each one with me. This lady wanted me to list each one. Fine!  So I started rattling off the different medications. We can play that game and go one by one. I have them memorized. She was asking me what the generic names were for the drugs….and I knew them. I was irritated, but remained kind. I imagine they have all sorts of types of people calling the pharmacy. By the end of the phone call she was much fr...

 Our basement had a little bit of a flood the other day with all the rain we had. Luckily it only involved a small portion and soaked a few area rugs. The biggest rug was a 5 foot by 7 footer. We basically use it as a barrier for the floor so it isn’t so cold. Paul scooped up 2 of the 3 foot by 5 foot rugs and wadded them up in a pile.  Today was the first day there was a smell of mold.  The smaller rugs went right in the washer. The bigger rug I spread out and then ran the carpet shampooed over it. I used the antibacterial soap and shampooed the hell out of it and sucked up all the water out of it. It smells much better down there. Nothing else was disturbed. We had to move a few plastic laundry baskets but nothing else had any damage to it. Just a small little bump in the road. I think we handled it well. I did some work today while I watched tv as I prepared for the upcoming week. I really like the flexibility I have. It will make room in my schedule to help out this w...

My orientation went well today. It might be a bit messy as this emergency service opens up, but it will be cool to work with an entire new team. I am excited because I am entering uncharted territory for myself. I will really learn some new things. After I got home, I deep cleaned our den area. This is our main entrance in the house. I have 8 paws that traps in wet and mudd. The rabbit scatters his hay around and makes a mess. I steam cleaned everything and am so glad we have tile. We picked Avery up at her dorm. We then went to dinner at the in-laws to celebrate birthdays. We had a nice time chatting and food was delicious as always. We dropped Avery off at her dorm. We didn’t want her driving all that way by herself in the foggy weather. Plus she would have to do a 10-15 minute walk from the parking lot in the dark, at night, by herself. Nope! Not safe. Although she does have her pepper spray. We brought Jiminy with us tonight. Ethan loves him so much. I am so happy to see Ethan dote...

Today was hectic and full of appointments, phone calls and video meetings. I told Avery to be ready by 12:45 so we could leave.  We had to stop at the lab first and YAY!!!!! They were open. Got my blood drawn and the results all came back normal! Woo hoo! This means we will stick to the plan of colonoscopy in March.  Lucky me! We then headed to Avery’s dorm. Moving her back involved an extensive closet of clothes, blankets, shoes and of course all of her plants. She had a whole laundry basket full of her plants. She has named them all and they have her perceived personalities. She is so cute. I made her leave the room so I could hide multiple little cards around her room. Each little card has either a joke, a piece of advice or something funny written on it like “Ethan farted on this card” so that she feels like a piece of home is with her. Later we went to dinner with friends and had a good time laughing and chatting the night away. I have to wake up early tomorrow as I am do...

 I was feeling kinda of blah this morning. I was annoyed by things that I probably shouldn’t have been annoyed by. It was one of those mornings that I wanted to be left alone so I wouldn’t hurt anyone’s feelings by being a jerk. But I just wanted to be a jerk. I wanted to have my pissy thoughts and wallow in them. I was thinking about my Dad who passed away on this day in 1995. I always wondered how he would have bonded with the kids, what he would look like now? I do think he keeps an eye on us and does what he can to keep us safe. He has his work cut out for him with Ethan.  I had a check up for my diverticulitis with my doctor. I planned it so I would have plenty of time to arrive and get to my appointment. I even stopped at the bank first. Wow! I was really checking things off my list. When I looked at where the appointment was, I read the address wrong and ended up at the wrong location. They told me I was at the wrong location at check in. Horrified, I called the office ...

 Today was yucky out. We constant state of being within a ground cloud. I was going to go for a walk but it was rainy and gross.  I spoke to the heart failure team in Rochester (this is what it is called) for Ethan to be transferred. They have to connect with the team in NYC supposedly, before we can get an appointment. This was call number 2 about it. The coordinator said she would call me back tomorrow or next week. It seems like a broad timeframe but I am trying to be patient. I spoke to a social worker regarding Ethan’s insurance. She wasn’t able to answer my questions so I am waiting on the name of someone who can.  I set up my onboarding for my moonlighting job. I will be starting at the emergency vet soon. Just one night (12 hour shift) a week. I look forward to dabbling in the clinic again. My worries are that my skills need sharpening. We will see how my body does with this. Also, I am trying to account for sleep recovery as I will need to have some solid sleepin...

 We had Ethan’s nephrology appointment today. This is still with NYC and their transplant group. Transferring is a lot of work.  I need to commit to completing all the tasks to move forward. I realized today that I over committed myself in February. I am bummed I made that mistake but will ultimately have to own up to my mistake. It shouldn’t be too bad but I don’t like letting people down. Avery was so helpful today. She ran an errand for me and it was super helpful. I love how much she spoils me by helping out. I will miss her. I am getting closer to starting my second job. It is at the local emergency clinic. It will be an overnight shift. We will see how I can juggle it. I completed most of my paperwork today. The cool thing is, I show up, be a vet tech and then leave. I don’t have any responsibility other than getting my job done. One thing I was thankful for today was that it was snowing. The sky was dropping large intricate flakes and they were slowly floating down to e...

 Back to normal life. I was able to get a lot accomplished before work. I washed our bedding and towels. I took care of folding and putting laundry away. I was able to organize some of my work things. It was nice. Ethan worked today for most of the day. He then came home and took Jiminy up to his room for the afternoon. They are so cute and have bonded. I was hoping this would happen. Animals offer such a wonderful support system. We can and should be learning from them. You never have to guess how they are feeling. They growl when they are mad. They don’t hold a grudge. They offer silent support when we don’t know we need it. They sniff butts…which, let’s face it, sometimes is funny. Ultimately, they offer unconditional love.  Paul got home early. He got out the snowmobiles because Ethan wanted to ride around the field for a bit. This is exciting because this is pre-transplant Ethan activity. We are seeing more and more of our original kid. Each small step is a quiet win for ...

 Avery and I drove home ALL day. It was such a long ride even though it was only a little over 5 hours. My sciatic nerve was bothering me from all the sitting. We pulled over a few times to empty bladders and stretch our legs.  Avery was exhausted. I drove the first few hours and she promptly passed out. She took over driving so I could get some work done in the car. I have a few appointments this week, so I had to make up my hours over the weekend. When we arrived home, we unpacked the car and then went grocery shopping. The fridge was bare. There was an empty pizza box on the shelf.  Ethan was flying solo as Paul went snowmobiling for the weekend. He left mid day Saturday and came home today.  This is snowmobile season. I can’t make plans with him during snowmobile season. What if it snows? Ha ha Ethan had his buddy over for a bit. I like his friends. They are nice kids. Avery went to watch the Bills game for a bit. She isn’t into football, but they had pizza and w...

 It was 18 out today. Crunchy weather. So cold everything crunches…even my joints. It is so cold it hurts. 🥶  I dropped Avery off at her conference. I had some expense reports to work on and then 2 hours of conducting interviews. I used today as a catch up day from not being able to work earlier in the week.  Ethan sent the cutest video. He has been working on teaching Jiminy how to go down the stairs. Jiminy has finally gotten brave enough and, with Ethan’s help, has learned how to do it safely. I lived at the end of the video, Ethan’s celebratory cheer for Jiminy’s success! Ethan has really bonded with Jiminy. Sometimes animals help to heal us in ways we can’t even imagine. Some 6 year old explained it beautifully. Humans live so long so they learn how to love, be a good person and live a good life. Dogs already know how to do that, so they don’t have to stay as longer  I then met one of my sorority sisters for lunch. We met at 1:30 and didn’t leave the restaurant...

 Avery had the start of her conference today. She took the car and was quite nervous. It is scary showing up somewhere and you don’t know anyone. She does suffer from generalized anxiety disorder. It was starting to get the best of her before she even left. She was convinced the day was going to go poorly and everyone would think she is an idiot. She had looked at the roster and realized she was the only freshman at the conference. There was one sophomore and the rest were juniors, seniors and professionals. We needed to “reframe it.” The term I learned in NYC in 2020 by a student psychologist. “Signing up for a conference is a sign of the desire for growth. You don’t need to have all the answers. You figure it out as you go along. Some things go well, some don’t. You just learn and move on.” Tomorrow I will drop her off. I made lunch plans with a friend I haven’t seen in years. A sorority sister from college. I drop her off in the morning and pick her up around 8 pm. I imagine she...

Jiminy slept in the bed with me. His little toes were not going to get cold on my watch last night. I missed him and all the dogs. Penny was super pumped we were home. She just about turned herself inside out. Paul and I had a coffee date this morning to catch up on the previous 5 days. We chatted for a bit and then he had to go to work. “See in in 3 days” I said to him. Avery got up and moving and decided she wanted to get on the road. We drove for a little over 5 hours and got to our final destination. We decided to go on a walk into town. On our way we passed a Chinese restaurant the Wing Dong. Or was it Dong Fong? Or Long Duck Dong? Something with Dong….and we were giggling about it.  The town is cute. The buildings are light up at night with spotlights creating a dramatic look. The buildings are older but kept is beautiful shape. The church bells were ringing. The fire whistle went off (4 whistles in a row). I know that is significant but can’t recall why. It was endearing tha...

 Our flight home was delayed. Not terrible. Just by about a half hour. We have had sooooo much worse! Avery and I still arrived at the airport at our normal time.  We tucked ourselves near our gate but where there wasn’t a lot of traffic. When we got on, we sat towards the back. I like Southwest. I have never had a bad flying experience with them AND it was a direct flight. A family with children was in front of us, in the row next to us and the 1st and second row behind us. There was not one second one of those babies wasn’t crying. It was a lot to listen too. The babies were annoying. I felt so bad for the parents. They all were so patient and didn’t lose their cool. I would have hated everyone listening to my baby cry.  We made it home with a bit of turbulence, but not awful. We were greeted with the kind of cold that makes your teeth hurt.  When we got home, we unpacked our suitcase with the dirty clothes and bathing suits and replace them for the next trip, leav...

 Today I was on my game at the conference and felt like I collected a lot of valuable contact information. I am hoping that it will help me fill some positions. The cool part of this conference is that I had a lot of fun getting to know my co-workers on a personal level. We attend the same meetings. We show up, receive information, ask questions, and disconnect. There is no real socializing. This was an opportunity to get to know them. I was quite thankful for that. I work with a lot of cool ladies. Avery and I headed over to Sea World in the afternoon. It had just rained buckets before we headed over. It was an introverts dream. No lines. No people. No rain for the rest of the afternoon. It was comfortable about 75 and not blaring sun. Amazing! We got to go on the BEST day.We had an absolute blast. Each set of animals we stumbled upon was even more entertaining than the last. We saw the flamingos. 🦩  The stood tall and proud. They smoothly strutted around with their chests p...

Today was an early start. I was able to get to the conference early enough to help set up. It is so interesting to see co-workers in person! These are people that I see on screen and my brain just fills in assumptions for things I don’t know.  Somehow I have a preconceived notion about how tall each coworker is, and then when it is different than that, it makes me wonder why my brain filled in the gaps with that information. It happens on a subconscious level too. Avery showed up at the conference. She would hang out for a bit, walk around and then come back and sit with me. After a while she walked back to the hotel and she had a nap. Bliss! It was a nice afternoon for her to walk. The temps were in the 70’s. The air smells tropical. This evening we had plans to meet up with a business colleague to discuss strategies. It went great and I got many ideas. We got back to the hotel after 9:00. I then had to log in to my email and do a bit of work to support my hospitals. I closed my c...

I didn’t have to “work” today until 2:00. Avery and I went to Ripley’s Believe it or Not. I do like two headed animals. I enjoyed all of their information on Al Capone. We saw a cool space exhibit. But the coolest thing was the rotating tunnel. It was a straight walk way with a rotating cylindrical tube with colors that were glowing under a black light. It created an illusion that you were also moving even though we weren’t. We had a lot of fun and then we walked over to icon park for a bit. It was a little brisk out but not bad. There were lots of good restaurants there. We then took an Uber to the conference center and walked around the EXPO. This is a place approximately 3 football fields of area that vendors go to showcase their product to veterinary professionals. Avery and I had lunch. As we were eating, someone came over and sat down right next to me. I realized it was my boss from a clinic in Georgia that I worked at back in 1999 and 2000. We chatted for about a half hour or so...

 We had a full flight this morning. I boarded in group A and Avery was in group C. To save a space for Avery, I practiced excessively coughing, blowing my nose and sneezing. Who wants to sit next to that. Once she made it on, I stopped 😊. Pro travel tip. Follow me for more traveling tips. My power nose failed me again. Anytime someone thought about farting on the plane, I could smell it. I basically sat in 2 plus hours of fart smell. Yuck. We had to wait until most of the plane was deplaned. Avery had to go back several rows to store her carryon. We had the time to wait so it was no big deal! When we got off the plane I needed to go to the bathroom. The first three bathrooms I deemed too crowded. It was becoming more emergent of a situation as we went bathroom to bathroom. They were all so people-y. I found one with a short line. As I rounded the corner, I found out why. Someone had a fecal catastrophe in the handicapped bathroom. There was stool smeared all over the place. It app...

 Ethan had to go and get lab work done this morning. We got to the lab, signed in via QR code and then sat in the car waiting for the call. And hour went by. I finally said to Ethan, “let’s just go in and check where you are in the Que.” We went in and asked. Apparently they tried calling us and my fat fingers typed in the wrong number. Ugh! Ethan got his blood drawn and we left. Total time there…2 hours. It takes them forever to enter in manually all the tests that NYC wants to run. 5 pages of tests. I checked the labs as they came in, later in the day. Lo and behold….they never did the one that Ethan’s local doctor put orders in for. I didn’t have the forethought to mention that to them. Why would I? It is already in the system. What I don’t know (obviously) is how it all works. There has to be a reason it didn’t automatically pop up. Once I noticed that the test wasn’t performed, I sent in a message to my chart to see if someone from the doctor’s office can call the lab and add ...

 Today Ferguson got his teeth cleaned 🦷. He had 3 teeth that were unhealthy. They were extracted and now he has a less sore mouth that is much better for his heart. My public service announcement is that if you have your pet’s teeth cleaned regularly it keeps them with a less painful mouth. They can’t complain about how their mouth feels. If they have bad breath, something is wrong. Now Ferguson and Penny have nice clean breath and a healthy mouth. Jiminy will be next year most likely. Ferguson enjoyed his drugs. I kept a close eye on him as he recovered from anesthesia. My beautiful grey faced old man snored and rested wrapped up in blankets on the couch. He was warm, cozy and I could watch his every move. We spent the evening with our in-laws celebrating Paul’s birthday. We had a wonderful meal and desserts.  We enjoyed the company and Paul was even able to help them a bit with a few things around the house which makes his heart happy. I gave Ferguson his pain medication be...

 Today was pretty quiet. I am in the process of waiting to talk to the social worker about insurance for Ethan. His nephrologist emailed asking for him to get more lab work done. I did a bit of work trying to get the hospital to resubmit claims from October. Oye! I am excited to go to Florida. We did have to switch around our day at Sea World, so I also changed that today. I wanted to make sure that Avery and I had one fun day doing something together.  Avery had Rachel over today. It was fun to hear them giggle and chat! They watched an anime show on the boob tube. I am still tired so I finally am going to sleep in my bed tonight. I have been on the couch for the past several days. I find the couch quite comfortable and I don’t hear Paul snore. He doesn’t hear me cough. Win-win.

 We had Ethan’s appointment today. It started with his doctor emailing us on her way to work to let us know she was running late due to traffic. She gave us updates as the appointment time got closer. She had the pharmacist meet with us first to buy her some time.  This was being done between 8 and 9 in the morning. This accessibility is what we are walking away from. It’s scary. I have been in the pharmacy, emailed the doctor and she sent a script over to have it filled. They are so responsive. I also had a few moments of sadness as these people have been part of our lives for the past couple of years. They have been so kind even when Ethan was at his worst.  Some of the questions asked were hard. Ethan did great. He was engaged, asked appropriate questions and gave appropriate answers. He knew his stuff. The only thing they said to work on is to call in his own refills. Once he does that, he will be autonomous. However, his doctor loves our plan of always having us both...

 As I sat on the couch with my coffee, I remembered the mornings of rushing out the door at 5:30 am to start my 10 or 12 hour day. Ugh! How did I do that for over 20 years day in and day out? Paul came and sat down with me briefly. At that moment, Ethan came downstairs. He and Jiminy have bonded and he gives Jim special treatment. He saw Jiminy, with his one little eye, staring at him. Jim’s tail was wagging and he was ready to play.  Ethan just started running in a circle through the house. From the livingroom to the kitchen, through the dining room, back to the living-room. I thought about our donor, Nicole. This little micro moment of joy was not possible without her checking that box for organ donation. Both Paul and I watched this go on and on for a few minutes. We were laughing and the little pitter patter of 5 pound chihuahua feet thundering across the floor. It was a wonderful moment and a gift. We also got our tickets today for Aruba. Yay! It’s actually happening!!!!!...

I ordered my 2025 big planning calendar today. This will help me start planning trips for 2025. I have a few bucket list places I want to go. Most involve beaches, sand and margaritas, with sunshine therapy mixed in. My funk was still hanging on today. I laid low the majority of the day. Just puttered around. I am sleeping on the couch because Paul’s stage of this cold keeps him snoring. So I have removed myself so that I can sleep too.  We got some snow last night. Paul took the snowmobile for a spin around the field. He was like a kid in a candy store. So happy. I got my suitcase out for Florida. I packed my bathing suit already. There is a hot tub at the hotel we are staying at. That will be a welcomed joy.

 There is a heaviness in my chest. My eyes feel tired. I have a constant tickle in my throat and a dry cough. My ears are tight with pressure. My hands are dry and cracking from obsessively washing them. Ick! We have the funk! Sleeping last night was awful. In addition to periodically choking on my own post nasal drip, Paul was snoring and choking on his post nasal drip. What a sexy pair we are. I still did some of my weekend chores. All three dogs got a bath. They got to warm up in front of the fire. They got their bedding switched out. I love snuggling with clean and fresh dogs. There was a lot of resting as well today. Sometimes my headache got the best of me.  Paul and I spent time watching Law and Order again. It’s such a good show. We also enjoyed the dogs. They were cute and snuggly and formed a sort of pile of dogs. Avery went to her friends house for the night. Ethan had his friends over. They went to the store and then eventually hung out at his buddy’s house.  ...

It was frigid outside but warm in our house, thanks to Paul’s wood splitting and stacking efforts. For the past month I have been saying that we likely will have a snow storm the day Avery and I fly out to Florida. It figures, we are expected to get snow that day. I am hoping that with a week away, the forecast will change so our flight isn’t delayed. I felt tired today. Like I wanted to nap. My throat just feels a little scratchy. Other than that, my “illness” is moving right along. We came together as a family and watch some episodes of modern Family. It is brilliantly written to be realistic and hilarious. While watching tv, a stink bug came along and “stinked” on my shirt.  My power nose smelled it for like an hour! YUCK! 🤮 

 Ethan’s appointments seem to be coming together for the big switch over to the adult care in Rochester. His appointment is Tuesday morning. It should be about 3 hours long. That seems intense! We are also trying to keep up with regular appointments too. Eye doctor, regular doctor, mental health check up for med approval…it just seems busy. But good busy. I am glad it is all virtual. This evening I discovered Farkle Friends. A game you can play with people you know. So that was fun. I spent some time playing that. It is a new way to exercise my brain. I am heading to bed early. I feel tired and my throat has felt dry. It may just be that our house is dry…OR I am developing a little funk. We shall see how it develops.

 Today I woke up expecting to have sore arms. They were bruised, but not sore. I was happy about that.  I was able to get a GI follow up at the end of January. I was happy about that.  Work has been a slow go since the holidays. I am waiting for the flood gates to open back up. Avery and I leave for a Vet Conference in 10 days. The conference is in Florida. I looked at the weather and it looks like it will be nice while we are there. It’s funny…there are so many people I know that are going. I look forward to seeing them all. Still a germiphobe….I am also worried about how people-y it will be. Luckily, Avery and I will quarantine while we go to her physics conference…immediately after Florida. Still trying to keep Ethan illness free as much as possible. Paul wasn’t feeling so good today. I wiped all of the knobs down, handles, facet handles, toaster over and anything else he could have touched…before Ethan came downstairs. I advised the kids to wash their hands multiple t...

 Here is my public service announcement for today. I called Spectrum and got my bill reduced by $35/month for 2024. It takes so much time. Sit on hold. Get transferred to different people. But for saving $420/year, it was worth it. That is money going into our travel fund for 2025 😊. I discussed with Verizon my bill a few weeks ago. There were newer plans I could sign up for without commitment, that were cheaper. I also enrolled in autopay from my savings account. Because of these two changes, my bill was reduced by $67 per month. Add that $804 per year to my travel fund for 2025. I called Waste Management as directed from last year. They were able to reduce my bill by $40 (I pay annually not monthly) for the year. $40 bucks is $40 bucks. Please look at your bills. It is a pain, but it can be worth making a phone call. I love saving money and I love helping others save money. Avery and I went to donate plasma today. I was excited because the thought of helping someone that is real...

 Day 1 of the new year. We all slept in. We puttered around, completing small projects we were working on. I decided to empty my change jar and roll it. I knew that Ethan would want to go through my coins. He likes weighing the coins and examining them for imperfections. Some of this change has been sitting around for at least 15 years or so.  Lots of stuff from the 60’s, 70’s 80’s and 90’s….which is ancient to Ethan. This is another pre-transplant hobby that is surfacing again. Ethan had bought a gram scale to weigh coins to look for coins that had different weights etc. he couldn’t find his gram scale.  He had looked and looked. He asked if I had seen it. I didn’t offer to help right away. But as the minutes flew by, I could hear the frustration of him looking for it, grow. He started slamming things, dropping things and some huffing and puffing. I stopped working with the coins and asked him if I could help him look. He was frustrated and a little bit snarky. Instead o...

 Happy New Years Eve day! I slept terrible. I ended up moving to the couch. My intestines were pissed off and my diverticulitis spot was sore. It never has fully resolved. It wasn’t “painful” but uncomfortable. I had a headache and generally felt like crap. I took it easy  and only worked on a few chores. I napped for a few hours this afternoon. Things were feeling a bit better except the headache held on.  I will be calling the GI doctor on Tuesday. I just need to amputate my abdomen, re-route the plumbing and be on my way. Ha ha. Ethan, Paul, Avery and I went to my Aunt and Uncle’s house for the evening. We had an abundance of wonderful snacks and pizza.  We played cards and Left, Right, Center. We also watched the Nashville New Years Eve special. We liked watching the people in the background.  We brought Jiminy and Penny to play with their dog friends, Maggie and Mindy. The dogs chased each other and played, then napped pretty hard. They will be tired tomorr...